Intrusive thought and Intentional thought

This is English ver about last article.

I am so sorry I have not written in a while especially in English.

I went to studying abroad again to study English and I was preparing for IELTS on last week end.

In those days I felt depressing because I had a lot of things and trouble. I’m gonna explain these things later.

At first, I introduce Intrusive thought and Intentional thought.

When people live life, we absolutely think something every day.

For instance, what do I want to eat? or what should I wear today etc.

You wanna think it that’s why you think it. These are normal thoughts which is called “intentional thought”.

I guess this concept is not so difficult to understand because we do in dairy life.

By the way, don’t you feel this experience.

You were trying to fall in sleep, but you couldn’t sleep because you thought something.

Actually you didn’t  think intentionally. It was without control.

 In addition, even you tried to stop thinking it, you couldn’t stop it.

These thoughts are named  “Intrusive thought”. 

Don’t you feel the thought invites your brain? haha

In addition, if you feel strong stress, it easy to fall into intrusive thought.

Instead, how much you often fall into intrusive thought is gonna be scale about how much you feel stress.

I also felt a strong stress few weeks,

So I couldn’t sleep because of intrusive thought even though i wanna fall in sleep.

After even I wake up, I thought a lot unintentionally. It was continuing about 20 days.

It was thought time for me when I think back the days.

 However, when I can see the light at the end of the tunnel,  my way of thinking changed intrusive thought to intentional thought.

Human brain are interesting.

(Reference: Possibility and problem of PTG Kanako Taku edition & author Kaneko shobo)

Until above was explaining about psychological terminology, and from here I gonna explain what I felt so much stress recently.

Moreover, I should report you my career changed in this article.

I think why I felt a lot of stress this time because there were many causes.

The begging was during language studying abroad.

Even thought I was studying every day, I couldn’t feel improving my English and time was passing.

While I was feeling a frustration not to improve my English, my boyfriend talked to me to brake up. It was before 3 days when I went back to Japan.

After I came back  from Indonesia, the grade of previous semester released, and I started to prepare to apply graduate in UK and Australia. But there were some problems.

Each entry requirements need the grade of undergraduate. And then my university GPA is different from common GPA calculate system.

It was my fault I didn’t realize the difference until I got previous semester grade.

And also, my grade was totally not enough the each entry requirements.

I enquired each universities through email, but they didn’t give exactly answer until I would get final grade.

And then other problem came out at that time.

The Japanese government made a national qualification as psychologists and they announced the curriculum end of this September.

I was thinking to take the qualification before I entered my university because my father told me the government was planning to make the national qualification. 

However, I haven’t taken the enough classes which the qualification require.

If I gonna graduate next spring, I lost capability to take the national qualification.

That is why I don’t have any option to postpone my graduation for next September.

In addition, I concluded to change my career order; I should take first the qualification and study positive psychology.

If I have some qualifications or practical work experiences, it gonna be advantageous to applying graduate in UK or Australia or US.

I had high motivation to study positive psychology recently, so I won’t change the order honestly,

But this is a better way for me now.

I regretted myself that I took too many class before I went to Canada, and I didn’t get good grade each classes.

I told my situation for some of my friends, and they also agreed this was the better way considering my situation.

Finally, the intrusive thought was gone.

I was relieved because I could sleep well for the first time in few weeks.

Therefore, I gonna stay in Japan at least more 3 years.

I realized its are big stress for human that something happen unexpected and anxiety about future.

If you realize you are thinking as “intrusive thought”, you should take care yourself because it is sign which you feel strong stress.

Bye